From theatrical_muse: Headlines
One of the consolations for getting caught, headlines are. Well, all right, the only one. See, if I never got arrested, I'd've been well known only to assorted fences and cracksmen, but a headline like "MASTER THIEF RESTAL NABBED" almost makes it worthwhile. I collected them: "TOP SAFE MAN CAUGHT" (not that it was a particularly safe life, mind), "JEWEL THIEF SENT TO CF1", "ART GALLERIES SAFE: RESTAL IN CUSTODY (bit wordy, the old Londondome Crier, or the Londondrone Weeper as we called it), and "RESTAL EXILED". Very pithy that last one.
Funny thing though: you only get your name in print as a thief when you're nicked or sent down, but turn rebel and it's always up in caps. "RESTAL LEAVES SIGNATURE" (well, I like to scratch my initials on the hard ones), "ACE RESTAL" (a favourite one, that, from the Lindor Times, after I told Tyce I'd got Zen to put well over the minimum 25 little pursuit ships on the side of the Liberator), but the best one of all is "RESTAL STILL AT LARGE".
And long may it remain so.
From theatrical_muse: Headlines
From theatrical_muse: Have you ever seduced someone or has anyone ever seduced you?
I've flirted with people--it's a game I never expect to win--but I've never seriously tried to seduce anyone. See, my self-esteem isn't that healthy anyway, so I prefer not to be the one who makes the move. Just setting yourself up for rejection there.So I just flirt in a joking way in the faint hope that someone may actually show a spark of interest.
As for being seduced, yes!
Masha was the first. It was after a successful job we were both on, and she was so hyped up and excited and impressed with my safe-cracking, she wanted me. And why not? She was beautiful—tiny and lively with long shining straight blonde hair—and she had a wild reputation so I was both flattered and terrified. Only lasted three months in the end--when the novelty went, so did she. I don't think I was as upset as people expected me to be, it was nice to get my independence back, do what I wanted without always thinking about what Masha wanted. Besides, we hadn’t been friends, not what I call friends, someone you could tell anything to, someone who was just happy to be with you and not do anything.
Same with the other girls, both of them, Sal—great sense of humour, Sal--and Klivia, bright girl, but ambitious, wanted to be—and have—a somebody. Nice enough while it lasted, but no tragedy when it ended. Never meant anything, see, not like with Serrin and Doty next door to my mum, skinny little Serrin and big plump Doty who loved each other so much they couldn’t live without each other. Mind you, it'd be frightening to care that much.
And then there was Kerril. She made the move of course. I thought it was because we were about to die, and me the only bloke on the planet and all that, but she said she loved me. Not enough, mind you--she loved her big dream of going back to nature on a new untouched world and living the simple life more than me. She chose it without even thinking, then thought about asking me. Sometimes I regret not going (well, Bayban had a bloody great laser cannon on me at the time) but it's just as well. Not cut out for the pioneer life, me, and I’d have had to live up to what she’d already seen of me, doing what I do best. I'd rather miss her than to see her stop loving me.
Not settling for less next time though.
From theatrical_muse: Old acquaintance
I think I'm about the only one who hasn't run across an old friend or acquaintance since I left Earth. No, I tell a lie, there was poor old Gan too. And you know what, I'm relieved. I mean, look at how it's gone for the others. Avon's 'old friends' all tried to turn him in, kill him, or cheat him. No wonder he stopped trusting people, even me who'd only ever do the last and only in a game. Cally's meeting with an insane old god and her sister (not at the same time I might add) didn't go well in either case, Jenna's old pirate mate collared us--literally. I'd rather not think about the time we had to rescue Blake's cousin from Travis and his crimmos, and Tarrant apparently once knew that nutter Bayban the Butcher (well, he would be if he was compared to Tarrant, wouldn't he?). As for running into Blake again, I still have nightmares about that.
So on the whole, I'd rather not have any, thanks.
From theatrical_muse: What are you afraid of?
Hahaha, you've come to the right person here. Let me give you a list.
- might as well get the big ones out of the way first: death
- being shot at by people I haven't even met (so impolite!)
- being alone
- catching a disease (you wouldn't believe how many showers and vitamins I took after that Fosforon business)
- looking stupid, and yes, you'd think I'd be used to that
- carnivorous plants with designs on my body
- Avon, sometimes
- bent mutters in black leather in general (that covers several)
- the dark--I like to see what I'm afraid of
- missions; I mean, they always go wrong at some point
- spiders bigger than me
- Orac (go on, look at the little plastic bastard's record. I'm beginning to think he's playing for the opposition)
- plasma bolts
- wolf snakes
- Tarsian warg-stranglers
- balloons that have mostly gone down--look, touching them just gives me the creeps!
- food with fur, especially green
From theatrical_muse: What do you live for?
Eh? Well, it beats the alternative! Seriously, what sort of a question is that? You mean what's the point? Lots of things!
I'm at the top of my profession, I'm fairly well known, he says modestly, and thanks to the Federation's policy of not turning naughty rebels into poster boys and girls, I can go anywhere without being recognised. Not very well thought out, that one, Servie old thing. And then there's the small things in life, like cheesy toast, a good hot vege vindaloo, a nice drop of vintage wine (anything older than a week'll do it), hot cocoa before bed, adrenaline and soma to calm the nerves after a space battle, fast stardives and strong forcewalls, safes with challenging locks, a cup of tea and a nice sit down...
And you know, when things are going badly, a good sleep, which I'm sure Avon would tell you reorganises and defrags the brain, usually makes things look a bit better in the morning. Or what passes for one in space.
From theatrical_muse: If life's a game who do you think is winning?
"Well, not me" is my immediate reaction.
Mind you, I don't think anyone does for long. I mean, look at Servalan--and why not? She's a sight for sore eyes if she's not actually trying to kill you. Once supreme commander then president of the Federation (and all those other titles she probably made up) and now a minor commissioner in one of the more unfashionable sectors (and I know because we lived there on Xenon, raising the tone considerably) and having to kill of anyone who remembers her in her glory is a bit of a come down. Blake certainly didn't win. Now I think of it, just about everyone we've met in the last few years came to a bad end and we almost did too.
I remember when the Pyroans blew up their planet, Cally thought they were the only ones who won that particular little stuff-up. I said at the time that if that was winning, I'd take losing, and you know what? Being around and not in prison or in front of a firing squad feels pretty close to winning to me.
Anyway, depends on what you call a winner. If it's the rich bastards with all their things, or the guys who give the orders, then I'm a loser. But I'm here on this ship with Kerril and my friends and that feels all right to me.
From theatrical_muse: What makes someone a hero? What makes someone a villain?
Um, hard to tell. I mean, Blake once said we were the good guys which was a bit worrying considering our criminal records and general bloody-mindedness. It's all relative, isn't it?
To the Federation, we're rebels and outlaws and terrorists, but to us, they're oppressive bastards who like to mess about with your mind, exile, kill, or sell you into slavery if you or even a relative steps out of line. But then you meet people who think that's all right because it makes for an orderly galaxy with the transporters running on time and all that. And then there are those who think we're some sort of romantic and brave heroes of the revolution which is almost funny when you know what a bunch of in-fighting bad-tempered, trapped by circs, space-going bastards we are.
Take Servalan too, and I don't mean it the way that Space Fleet song "Serving under Servalan does; far too dangerous. A lot of people think she's the best military commander since Genghis Khan and is all that stands between proper society and chaos. We know her a bit better. She's a cold-blooded snake who'd bite anyone who crosses her, and as beautiful.
Anyway, a hero is someone on your side who's not too incompetent, and a villain's against you. Easy.
Thought I'd have a go at this just in case I decided to go in for something a bit more legal. I mean you never know.
1. Go to this this site.
2. Put in Username: nycareers, Password: landmark.
3. Take their "Career Matchmaker" questions.
4. Post the top fifteen results.
1. Optical / Ophthalmic Lab Technician
2. Special Effects Technician
5. Dental Lab Tech
6. Electronics Assembler
8. Office Machine Repairer
9. Electronics Engineering Tech
10. Electrical Engineering Tech
12. Musical Instrument Builder and Repairer
Eh? A third are techs! Must be all the time I've spent helping Avon while annoying the hell out of him. Nah, if I ever decide to go straight, I'd pick 4, 7, 11, or 14.
Upholsterer? Dunno about that, but I'll test the products out if they like. :-) I'm a bit disappointed publican's not in there though.
From theatrical_muse: Where do you see yourself in twenty years?
Alive would be nice.
Certainly not being chased about the galaxy anyway. I mean, either this rebellion succeeds (unlikely) or I retire from the profession (more likely every day, frankly). Let's see, I'd be about 55, and I'd hope I was settled down somewhere safe and warm by then, on some planet with good weather, palm trees. scantily-clad women (and me) on the beaches, and a distinct lack of storm troopers with a predilection for shooting at me. I rather fancy running a bar actually. Maybe one by the sea that serves cocktails with fruit and coloured paper umbrellas in them: tourists are usually a happy lot.
I'd keep my hand in, mind you (in the occasional rich bastard's safe, I mean) but not too close to home. Don't want to piss in my own tent as Blake used to say.
It would be nice to have someone to come home to as well, but I'll be happy with being safe--and cracking a few.
From theatrical_muse: Which is the more exquisite sensation: revenge, relief, or vindication?
Well, this one's easy!
I've never been much for revenge. Don't really see the point. It just causes more of the same, you see. People revenge themselves on you for the revenge you took on them and so on and so forth, and before you know where you are, you've got a family feud or a series of wars that run for centuries. I'm not saying to turn your cheek so the fist can slam into the other one, mind you. It's best just to laugh it off right then like I do, with a smart remark, a practical joke like bolting all their furniture to the ceiling of their cabin, or a few strong drinks to dull the pain if it's too dangerous to do either. Sitting on it, then serving them a stale meal they won't swallow just isn't worth it.
You'll probably live longer too. And that can't be bad.
Vindication usually means I was right about something nasty happening (I can always sense danger, you know) and I can't say it brings me much pleasure. Saying "I told you so" is another good way to shorten your life for that matter, especially around Avon.
Why would anyone pick anything but relief? I mean, relief feels good! I just wish it happened more often.
From theatrical_muse: Religion
Well, religion's banned on all Federated worlds, you know, but they can't stop you believing in what you like. Well, they can actually if they muck about with your mind, but with me it never took.
They let us Deltas have our Festival of Light at the end of the year though because it keeps us happy. First you light a candle every night for eight days from a special candle called the servant (fair enough, Deltas are service grades, not that I ever went along with that) and eat good food and play games. After that, for the last four of the Twelve Days, we have lights blazing everywhere and markets and hot food stalls, and people give each other presents, and forget their worries and laugh. It's a good time and it's one of the few things I miss about Earth.
Underneath it all, where the authorites can't see it though, there are old stories about a lamp burning for longer than it should have in a temple, and freedom from oppression, and a baby being born who grew up into someone who said everyone was equal. He got killed for it--well, you could see that one coming, couldn't you?--but you know, there was a thief there with him too who was promised a place in paradise. I like that. A man can hope.
From theatrical_muse: You've just won an award! What would it be and why?
Best thief in the galaxy of course! After all, they said Central Control was impregnable (sounds like it had a chastity belt on) but I got through that lock in a minute flat. A doddle if you don't count having to run through a minefield first which almost did me ticker in. Not that I boast about it a lot, even if it was an act of dazzling brilliance, because it was there that me old mate Gan died, holding a blown-up (blown-down, really) door up so we could escape.
I still miss him.
Then there was the force field on Kezarn that I cracked and found a new world for a whole race of people. "Brave and clever" old Norl said I was, and it's not often I've heard those words used about me. Not that I like to think about that time all that often, even if I'm a planetary hero to those weirdoes, because then I think of Kerril who said she loved me but loved a new life more or she'd've stayed with me. wouldn't she? Mind you, if she had, she'd've found out I wasn't a hero at all but just the comic relief on and token Delta, though not as fast as she would've if I'd gone with her. Not your tough sinewy pioneer type, me.
I still wouldn't say no to a nice award though, preferably something stolen and exchangeable for cash.
You are... 2% unique
(blame, for example, your interest in adrenaline and soma)
and 12% herdlike
(partly because you, like everyone else, enjoy writing).
When it comes to friends you are normal. In terms of the way you relate to people, you are wary of trusting strangers.
Your writing style (based on a recent public entry) is conventional.
Your overall weirdness is: 33(The average level of weirdness is: 27.
You are weirder than 72% of other LJers.)
Find out what your weirdness level is!
What do they mean? I'm 100% unique!
From theatrical_muse: Mummy
This is what my mum told me once.
I was too young to have a baby. I was only eighteen, no more than a child myself. It wasn't fair. It was probably the same for my mother - she left me outside an orphanage at only a week old, and I never blamed her. You have to make your own way in this world.She used to say I stole hearts from the beginning, but I've really only managed it twice: my mum and Kerril.
"Do you want to see your baby?" the nurse asked. She held out a little bundle.
I shrugged. It wouldn't make much difference. I wasn't keeping it. The nurse laid it in my arms and I frowned at the tiny face. Wide eyes looked back at me and a small fist opened and closed. I caught my breath and touched the perfect little fingers, then the button of a nose. The mouth opened in a smile.
"What are you going to call him?"
I knew she was lost. "Vila," I said shyly, and smiled.
From theatrical_muse: Would you ever kill a human being?
Not face-to-face. I couldn't bring myself to. I mean, I'd see the life going out of them, and probably for the rest of mine.
That aside, I'm not sure how many people (and mutoids) I've killed using the Liberator's neutron blasters, and I don't much like thinking about it either. I always thought of pursuit ships as targets and I'd like it to stay that way.
Soolin said that was illogical and that if I didn't learn to shoot people at point blank range, I'd probably die that way (and I almost did, come to think of it, down there on Gauda Prime though the unsporting bastards got me from behind). In the end she gave me a lot of stun clips and said I could practise with those, and I did. On Mecron, I dropped the last trooper in a pack of them running by, though even then I shut my eyes when I pulled the trigger. The fellow had crawled off by the time I'd rescued the others (with the help of poor Gambit) so I didn't have any evidence to show her how well I'd done.
She still says that taking them down with the whites of their eyes showing is the best adrenaline rush you can get, but give me a glass of month-old red any day.
From theatrical_muse: Time
Time, eh? Well, whether you call it time or porridge or hard or jug, or even 'the penal experience' like that
litererery (never know when to stop with that word) classics character Tony Soprano, it's all the same: you got nicked.
Jugs I have known include:
- the JD wards / juvie / Juvenile Detention Wards - called wards because they try to reprogram you into a nice brainless little citizen who'll never had a thought of their own again.
- CF1 in other words Correctional Facility One, a planet where they send first-time offenders and white collar crims who steal from the doubtful comfort of a cramped office cubicle. Lots of petties and embezzlers, and not a bad place because it's only for a few years and you get a bit of an education, the official courses and various others they might not know about. I officially did metal work and jewellery making, and off the record also taught an after-hours class in lock-picking even though I was only 14, plus learned how to fly a spaceship from some manuals I found in the library. I have fond memories of CF1, despite the female Space Rats who tried to adopt me as a mascot. I was on the escape committee and ended up breaking us out and nicking a supply ship which was all good for the CV.
- Cygnus Alpha. I didn't get to see much of that, but what I did put me right off being caught again. Nasty place full of religious nutters, thugs, and bad architecture. It made being a rebel an attractive career choice.
I'm finding it really hard to answer these things lately because they're so uninspiring, but apparently I have to do one in four or be kicked out. This one's not too bad, so here you go.
From theatrical_muse: I never thought I'd say this, but..
I miss Avon.
The one I knew back in the Blake days, I mean. We used to insult each other and I think some of the others didn't get it, but I could see the look of amusement in his eyes. If we really didn't like each other, I wouldn't have spent all that time playing chess with him, or helping (and annoying) him while he worked on his gadgets, or just sitting with him on the flight deck during the quiet times. Say what you like, we understood each other. All right, he was an Alpha and went to university and all that, but we had a lot in common: both thieves (though he preferred the term 'embezzler'), both not natural rebels and revolutionaries, both there because we liked Blake and maybe just a bit, underneath all the cynicism, we thought he might stand for something worthwhile.
All changed after he left, didn't it? First it was like he didn't want to admit he was friends with the rank and file like me, maybe because it'd undermine him with Tarrant and Dayna, and after we lost the Liberator, well, it wasn't the Avon I knew at all. No humour, no secret warmth in his eyes, no give and take.
I'm glad I don't know that Avon any more, but I still miss the old one.
All right, I'm bored. It's a long way between star systems, you know. Space is big.
First of all, some of those Pictaps thingies.
For a little man I'm a wonderful mover, wouldn't you say?
Stark does the Stykera Stomp
Tarrant's Mole wiggles his bum in his Doctor Who scarf
And now: ( Which Bohemian cat am I? )
From theatrical_muse: Talk about one thing you hope to do in the upcoming year that you have never done before.
Um, get bonded?
Never thought I'd settle down and play houses, and with Kerril I won't have to. Sure, we'll be bond-mates, but she likes travelling (or making fast getaways as the case may be) as much as I do, and on a ship you're always at home come to think of it.
Thing is though, since possession is nine-tenths and all that, I'm officially the owner and captain of the Mumak, once a lumbering great Gauda Prime pine and fine pine products freighter, and I'm not sure I can officiate at my own bonding. Cally's the rebel leader these days, so maybe she'll do the honours.
[grins wickedly] Shall I go for sickening kitsch like I suspect Avon and Blake did and have lots of flowers and Lucy as an attending kitten in a pink ribbon? Nah. I have a low gag reflex. I think a quick ceremony in our best suede and leather respectively with an honour guard of Soolin with a huge gun loaded with blanks she can fire afterwards, and maybe if we're in a system, we can blast a few asteroids to smithereens. It's always nice to including some traditional female touches like that for the ladies. And a party the night before for the guys (well, me and Stark and Tarrant these days) where we can drink ourselves silly while watching a few bodice-rippers like "Serving Under Servalan".
Yeah. That'd be nice.
Based on the lj interests lists of those who share my more unusual interests, the interests suggestion meme thinks I might be interested in:
1. liberator score: 64
2. servalan score: 58
3. orac score: 50
4. gauda prime score: 50
5. federation score: 40
6. b7 score: 34
7. reading novels score: 22
8. terry nation score: 22
9. blakes7 score: 22
10. cybermen score: 22
11. reading fiction score: 22
12. roleplaying game score: 20
13. fantasy role playing score: 20
14. shiny red pursuit ships score: 20
15. eglath score: 20
16. gallifrey score: 20
17. ars magica score: 20
18. rolemaster score: 20
19. space ships score: 20
20. peace-lovers score: 20
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I suppose the first 6 have got my attention a few times, but I'd rather not think about most of them. I miss the old Lib though.
I'm not sure who Terry Nation is, or where Eglath and Gallifrey are, but yes, my score of shiny red pursuit ships must be about 20 if not more. Is the ars magica Dayna's?
From theatrical_muse: What do your ancestors mean to you?
This one's a bit hard because I have no idea who they are. See, my mum was found as a baby on Restall Street, and yes, they misspelled that on her papers. All I know about my father is that he was called Vila too, and he was charming and sweet and funny and I take after him; mind you she only knew him the one night. Mum told me she was going to abandon me too after I was born because she was only 18 and I was a bit unexpected, but she fell for me when she saw me. And that's enough for me.
As for ancestors, the strange thing about them is family trees are usually shown upside down with the trunk at the top, but if you look at it the other way, it is a tree. I mean, start from me. I have two parents, they have two each, making it four, the next level is 16 and so on. It doesn't take long before you've got more ancestors that would fit on Earth let alone the galaxy. The only explanation has to be lots of overlap: they're all related to each other if you go back a bit, which means at some point Avon and I are.
Wonder if I ought to tell him. Right when he's doing something delicate on a circuit might be fun.